and with that, we have officially been introduced to egf's snottiness. i mean, we always knew they were snotty, but last night, it slapped us {me} in the face.
as the new neighbor on the block, we want to put forth our best foot, right? however, it's like a 'one-upper' on mowing. just when you think you're in the clear, the neighbor goes out and makes you look all bad, and then the domino effect comes into play and everyone has to mow their lawn.
however, they haven't met the vigs. {sigh}. aaron has his own agenda with the yard. as in, let's wait until it looks like a hayfield to mow. and then lets mow it with the old crappy mower with uneven blades to make it look like shit. and it'll be ok because it's mowed, right?
and so when you mow a hayfield, you gotta get the bailer out. or in our case, rake that shit up so it at least looks like you're attempting to fit in and make the neighborhood look decent. but that poses a problem when you don't have a rake. and you're not gonna just run over to the neighbors who stay on top of their lawn and ask for a rake...especially at 9 o'clock at night because naturally your husband decides that right after the boys' bedtime is a perfect time to mow.
so aaron digs through the garage. and bless our old farmer who sold us our house, as he left some mighty good gems for us. {console tv with the world's biggest universal remote, ancient push lawn mower, and bejeweled pheasant art} and what does aaron come up with? a rusty old HAY RAKE. of course. now i'm glad its 9pm so nobody can see me trying to rake my front lawn with this damn thing. if we didn't look like hicks with our hayfield, we do now.
anyways, moving on to disposing of our grass clippings. i thought i'd be proactive and just get it done with so i drive over to the city's disposal area. but i missed the turn and had to take the scenic route back to pull in, only to realize that it's locked. LOCKED. as in, you need a special badge to scan and let you in. wtf? who keeps their grass clipping disposal area under lock and key?! and furthermore, who the hell is going to break in and steal it?!
of course i'm horrified, and to make things worse, it's a one-way in and one-way out kind of area. so as i'm backing out onto major traffic {major for egf}, two vehicles are trying to get in. now, not only do i look like an idiot, but others are witnessing it. and what's worse, is that i still have my nd license plates, so to the snotty east siders, it looked as if i was trying to bring my nd grass clippings into their precious locked up grass clipping disposal area. that's probably why they locked it, to keep the nd riff-raff out!
so i have been hazed. by the city of egf. and they're laughing, because when you sign up for garbage and water, they don't tell you all that you need to know. they wait for you to learn the hard way and then they laugh as you look like a dumbass backing out of the one-way.
but i'll show them. i'll drive across the river and dump my clippings in the unlocked, unmanned, totally accessible gf disposal. snotty egf, i'm totally not paying for access to your precious disposal site. i'll learn to be snotty in other ways.
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| see? i'm not even kidding. hicks. |
